Fairy Tall Tale

Fairy tales are just that. Tales. We try to tell ourselves that everybody else's life is not a fairy tale, but that our lives will magically turn out that way. We will find our prince charming and he will live up to all that his name implies. He will be romantic, sensitive yet masculine. He will always be there when we need him. He will always put our needs first. {FYI- Reading too many love stories and watching too many chick flicks may or may not encourage you to try to kiss a guy who, by the way, has no interest in you like that, in front of his best friend. Awkward.}

My husband and I were engaged only a couple of months after our first official date. I didn't know him. He didn't know me. We hadn't even had time to become friends. I caught a glimpse of who he really was the night before our wedding. Don't worry, it wasn't a sign of any abuse to come. It's just that he was...grumpy. I know, right? He obviously hadn't read the Official Prince Charming Handbook and he wasn't aware that grumpiness was definitely not part of the code. I was a bit shocked, but like I said, it was the night before we became married for all.time.and eternity. I couldn't cancel it. What about the gifts? What about the reception? What about the dress?? No. I assured myself that he was just having prewedding jitters. Well... I was wrong. It turns out that his grumpiness (and not to mention nagging and lecture telling and impatience) were terminal. There was no curing this. There was no training it out of him. The opening-doors-for-me stopped. The flowers stopped. He had won his prize, there was no need to try any longer. At least, that's what I was thinking.

Now, you see, I'm a product of a divorce. As a matter of fact, my parents were going through their divorce while I was dating my husband. I promised myself that I would absolutely never get a divorce. My children would have both of their parents. Always. It didn't matter if it was after they were "old enough". There's no such thing. So what was I supposed to do in a loveless marriage? I took a good look at my husband and I realized that it in fact wasn't loveless. I was the one making things harder by trying to fit my perfectly good husband into someone he wasn't. My husband isn't a smooth talker that dotes on my every need, but he's faithful. My husband may not swoop me into his arms as we head to our boudoir, but he holds me close and kisses the crown of my head when I need to cry. He won't challenge someone to a duel to avenge my honour, but he'll get upset with me and jump right in calling the offending person a witch. He takes out the trash, mows the lawn, gets up at the crack of dawn to go to work every morning. He's not prince charming, but the longer I've been married, the more I realize that who knows how the great prince really acted. Only Cinderella. The longer I'm married the more I realize that it's not up to him to make me content and happy with my life...it's up to me. I make up the rules and only I can determine my attitude.

I may not have married the elusive prince charming, but my husband is my King, I am his Queen, and my castle is a messy little white house in suburb America. I'm living my own story and writing a new kind of fairytale. My happily ever after is now.